Monday, September 28, 2009

Truth #4 Don't believe everything you think.

Education week was very inspiring and uplifting and EDUCATIONAL! Fancy that. There is one thing though, that I can't get out of my mind. It is one of those true things that I wish I could share with everyone, because it can make their lives easier if they understand. Carrie Wrigley talked about it at education week. She is a licenced clinical social worker (Therapist) and a singer, so she was able to zing the truth of her words to our hearts through her music. Her message in part was "Don't believe everything you think. " People's thoughts are often twisted, in fact there are 10 forms of twisted thinking, but in our culture we typically employ 4 main ones.
1. All or Nothing: You see things in black and white, if a situation falls short of perfection, you see it as a total failure. If your program was great but one person suggested something you could do better, you feel like a total failure.

2. Self Blame: "It's all my fault" You think that everything that happens reverts back to you. If your child is having trouble at school, you think it is because you are a terrible mother.

3. Jumping to conclusions: Mary didn't say hi to me today she must be mad at me. or I'm going to blow my test, and flunk out of school. You interpret things negatively even though there are no facts.
4. Mental Filter: Focusing just on the things that are wrong. That program was great and you had 49 wonderful comments, but the only thing you remember is the one negative comment you heard. You obsess about this negative comment and ignore all the good.

There are actually 10 forms of twisted thinking and there are ways to replace good thinking with bad. As you talk to your friends you will notice these patterns. It's all in a book, The Feeling Good Hand Book, by David D. Burns, MD.

Anyway, when I start to feel depressed, If I slow down, I can recognize some form of twisted thinking going on. It is really powerful.

Just sharing something I know strongly to be true. Love you all
Kathy